The University of Warwick in England has a self-contained and grassy campus with a wide variety of woodland creatures romping freely in the shady parks and lawns. Moor hens, squirrels and hedgehogs are among the regular visitors. But the most ubiquitous wildlife in the campus is the humble duck. Every year mummy ducks will walk, quacking over their brood of fluffy ducklings, many students take time to feed them bread. The mummy ducks often get quite territorial and are known to head-butt rival females who try and steal their lunch. Little did one duck know that lunch would be its downfall.
As the year went on, the ducklings became larger, plumper, more delicious. And mysteriously a few started to go missing. Of course most campus-dwellers were blind to this disappearance but a couple of malladophiles noticed something was amiss. They were surprised as everyone when one day the campus paper headline read, in big bold letters:
Chinese Student Suspended for Killing and Eating a Duck!
According to the story, a Chinese student had stalked the ground of the university late at night and captures a few ducks with his bare hands or a fishing net (that part wasn’t clear). Upon returning to his hall, he killed it, cooked it and ate it. A student with whom he shared the same kitchen alerted the campus security guards, who – after recovering from the initial surprise – contacted the police. Apparantly the student was not aware that it is illegal to kill ducks in the UK. He was lucky it wasn’t a swan as they are all owned by the Queen.